The randomness of grief. Last night I was making supper and scrolling through videos and came on something that I almost immediately started sending to my brother. It’s like my heart and mind haven’t synced up on this yet.
Randomness
Expectations
I’ve learned not to expect to be a certain way or feel something specific, not to try to force my emotions into a rigid structure or timeline. Every day is a blank page, and love dictates how I deal with loss today.
Impact
Two months today. We didn’t have a daily communication for most of our adulthood, only a weekly text and random calls or sending pictures of something that reminded us of each other or childhood. So, I rationalized that his passing wouldn’t impact my day to day, but I was wrong. It has impacted me tremendously.
I Feel You 